Homesick

Ok...for those of you that don't know already, we recently moved to Mountain View, California (right outside of San Francisco). We have been here since the end of May. My husband and his business partner got accepted into a program that could potentially help them work on their company full time. It is an amazing opportunity and we have felt from the beginning that God has been leading us in this direction. We all moved in to one 1,500 sq ft house (the cost of living out here is insane). So there are 4 adults and 5 children walking this journey together. There are kids in closets and clothing in cabinets, but it has worked.

It has truly been amazing. I have had to rely on God in ways I never was forced to before. Don't get me wrong, mentally I thought I relied on him for everything, but the truth is that when everything you are so familiar with (I've basically lived in the same area my whole life) is stripped from you, you quickly realize just how much you rely on the things of this world. Not bad things in and of themselves....just not eternal.

In all honesty, the past few weeks have been really tough for me. I've missed home like never before. I miss running in to my neighbors on the way to get groceries. I miss my family. I miss the grandparents just stopping by to see the kids. I miss my church. I miss cook outs at my sister-in-laws and watching the cousins play. Believe it or not....I actually miss thunderstorms! And every time I have these thoughts I get homesick.

The reality is that we are kind of in limbo right now. Not knowing exactly what our future location will be. San Francisco....Birmingham....somewhere in between? This is hard for a "planner" like me to deal with. It scares me. It reminds me that I am not in control. I feel like I don't know what tomorrow holds and it unnerves me. But the truth is that even in Birmingham I didn't know what tomorrow would bring. Or whether it would come at all. James 4:13-16 says, "Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit' - yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.' As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil." Oh how grateful I am for this reminder!

This entire experience has reminded me what truly satisfies. Christ and Christ alone. Not Birmingham. Not my location. Not the things of this earth. But Jesus Christ. Whether He has us here for 2 years, 2 months or 2 minutes. To be with Him is why I am ultimately homesick. Oh how I long to see Him!!

The truth is I am grateful. Grateful for the unknown. Grateful for the opportunity to live more sacrificially. Grateful to meet new people. Grateful for how he is drawing me closer to Him daily. Grateful for the challenges. And although I miss home, I find so much peace in knowing that Heaven is truly my home and that Christ is all I need.

In the meantime though....I might have to get off Facebook a little more so my husband doesn't find me weeping over kid's running in the rain back home! :)